Grounds for Leaving the Country

Seems like every time something important is about to happen - a Presidential election, for example - there are always people around who will say something to the effect of: "If this happens then I am leaving this country and moving to Canada/Mexico/Sweden etc."

The first time I ever heard it was when Bush the First was about to be elected. I was sitting in a crappy Mexican restaurant with a grade school friend and his mother, who was a big Dukakis supporter even though he was a funny looking dude. The implication was that if Dukakis was not elected, life in America would become so awful and untenable that she would have no choice but to uproot the whole family and move to a foreign land.

Looking back, it seems odd to me anyone would try to talk politics to someone else's kid who, at that young age, was more interested in getting to the Ninja Turtles machine in the arcade.

I've always thought that sort of empty threat was a stupid threat to make, particularly in a Democratic Republic like ours where public opinion is so pandered to and so simultaneously ignored and where we need only wait four more years until we can elect someone else.

Really, threatening to leave the country basically amounts to poor sportsmanship.

So I've generally ignored such comments from others and try to avoid making such idle threats. But here I am twenty years later, about to do the same goddamn thing. Not about the President, but about this.

"Fire David Letterman Dot-Com"

"Our Mission Statement: David Letterman Must Be Held Be (sic) Accountable For His Disgraceful Statements"

Apparently these people are in such a fury that they don't have the time to proof read their own Mission Statement.

I'm not a huge Letterman fan. I've watched him before. I think he's funny, but I'm more a Conan kind of person.

But if David Letterman gets fired from his job for making a joke about Sarah Palin's daughters - a joke for which he has already apologized despite the fact that IT'S A TINY LITTLE JOKE TOLD ON LATE NIGHT TELEVISION INTENDED FOR SOMEONE WHO HAS ALREADY HAD ONE CHILD OUT OF WEDLOCK - then there is no hope here. We as a country will have completely lost our damned minds, and it will be time to move on to a country that can take a freaking joke without flying into a furious uproar over something trivial.

If that means learning Swedish, then so be it.