Oh boy. What’s first?
Ah yes! Those good ol’ college days! From my alma mater:
I feel a swelling (or pride) coming on.
(Are we really going to use that as a transition?)
We have no shame here, Parentheticals. Get used to it.
Bold Type is right. There is no shame here. Where was I?
Ah yes.
Speaking of dicks, add one more downside to the ever increasing list of publicly embarrassing acts the TSA makes you perform to get on your way to your gloriously comfortable flight to Charlotte: showing off your winkle to the body scanners.
As a side note, I love local news web stories. Why? Because (A) they will give you headlines like “Suspicious Package: TSA Worker Jailed After Junk Joke” which, like, if ever there was a Clever Title it’s that, and (B) you get to see mugshots of the type of person who beats the hell out of people for laughing at their penis size.
Take, for instance, this dude:
This guy gets riled up when people laugh at his package? Never would have seen that coming.
Enough dicks! Let’s talk about pussies!
(Come on, guys)
PIPE DOWN!
Not innuendo, but weirdly funny nonetheless:
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