Friday, May 27, 2011

Sports Curse: Miami Heat

I've dreaded this moment.

For a long time, I've been trying to hold this back.  I try not to interfere in the matters of the world, and let nature take it's course.  However, the time has come to act.  For justice, peace, and the American way.

As some of you may know, the Miami Heat just beat the Chicago Bulls to make it to the World Series, or whatever it is they call it for Basketball.  I am no friend of the Chicago Bulls, through circumstances of birth and hometown allegiance.  However, the entire concept of the Heat (read: buying a bunch of superstars and assembling a Basketball Juggernaut that MUST NOT BE STOPPEED) is diametrically opposed to what I love about Basketball.  You know.

And so, I must now invoke the Dread Sports Curse!!

For those of the faint at heart, avert your eyes!

MIAMI!  A city so hot, they named their Basketball team 'The Heat!'  Other teams in the NBA have one superstar or *GASP* no superstars!!  In Miami, they have three!

Look how serious they look!  They look that way because they are being paid serious money!

Despite having several sports teams, Miami is best known for their fish heavy diets, for being the setting for 'The Bird Cage' starring Robin Williams and Nathan Lane, and for this:

"If you can't stand the Heat... [putting on sunglasses] get out of Miami."


So here's to you, Miami Heat!  The true paragon of NBA success!  May you have an enjoyable sweep through the Finals!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

that's the bulls' problem! where were their leather blazers?!